THELMA THE UNICORN -- Talent On and Off Screen Can't Save This Abysmal Kids' Movie

Review by Camden Ferrell

Coming hot off of an Oscar nomination for his short film, Ninety-Five Senses, Jared Hess has teamed up with co-director Lynn Wang on his first ever animated feature, Thelma the Unicorn. This is Hess’ first narrative feature since 2016’s Masterminds. Unfortunately, this film fails on almost every possible level, delivering a predictable and cheaply made story that squanders the talents and idiosyncrasies of its writer/director and well-known cast.
 
Thelma is a pony with big aspirations to become a musical sensation with her friends. Despite their best efforts, they can’t seem to catch a break with people constantly dismissing them and never giving them a shot. After a fateful encounter with some paint and sparkles, Thelma finds herself looking exactly like a unicorn. This sparks a chain of events that pushes Thelma into the global spotlight and finding the fame she so desperately craved. However, she soon learns this is more than she bargained for. It’s a very basic story of pitfalls of fame that you’ve likely seen a million times before, and this movie doesn’t tread any new ground in that regard.
 
This movie was written by Jared and Jerusha Hess, but one would have a difficult time deducing that based on the final product. For better or worse, they’re a very idiosyncratic and quirky duo, but their signature style and charm are entirely absent from their most recent effort. It feels like another lazy children’s movie that could have been AI generated as opposed to an eccentric yet original script that they’re known for. This is the same duo that made one of the most iconically original movies of the early 2000’s, and it’s a shame that this is the quality of output they’re putting out now. This is even more disappointing considering they both wrote and directed such a brilliant short film just last year. 

From an acting perspective, there’s not much to talk about. Brittany Howard (of Alabama Shakes fame) leads the film as Thelma. Her singing is obviously phenomenal, but everything else is so ordinary that it’s hard to say it’s particularly good or bad as a voice performance. The film is supported by names like Will Forte, Jon Heder, and Jemaine Clement, and while they’re all hugely entertaining and talented people in their own rights, I felt nothing hearing their recognizable voices. Not to say that they phoned it in, but the movie lacks the personality you’d expect from the cast it acquired.
 
Even as far as children’s entertainment goes, this movie feels like a nothing burger at best. At worst, it’s another overstimulating, eerily animated, and completely forgettable movie for all ages. Every single scene follows the same beats we’ve been seeing forever, and it doesn’t do anything interesting with its premise, so the entire experience is disappointing and unpleasant. It might be something to mindlessly throw on for the youngest of children if necessary, but it doesn’t have much else to offer.
 
Thelma the Unicorn may have a talented singer in the lead role. It may have a well-known director and writing duo who always put out some original and quirky films regardless of quality. Unfortunately, this is not enough to make this movie sing the way it wants to. It’s a bland and formulaic story that is at times miserable to watch. It has absolutely nothing original to say and even at its most barebones level, it’s not entertaining.
 
Thelma the Unicorn is on Netflix May 17.
 
Rating: 1/5