ICE CREAM MAN -- STOP USING A.I. SLOP IN MOVIES!

Review by Steve Barton II

If you’re a modern horror fan, odds are the name Eli Roth strikes some sort of emotion in you. He’s a filmmaker that most folks either enjoy the weird and brutal stylings of or absolutely despise and dislike everything he’s involved in. From a critical perspective, his reception has been mixed, but he’s not afraid to take a chance or test the limits. Whether it’s taking liberties with a beloved property like Borderlands or making some of the most brutally violent scenes put to screen with Hostel, Roth is gonna put his personal touches on it. After his previous bomb with Borderlands, Eli Roth gets back to his horror roots with 2026’s Ice Cream Man. Ice Cream Man is set in the nice suburban town of Bayleen Bay that’s slowly falling into chaos due to the Ice Cream Man’s sweet treats that are transforming the neighborhood kids into monsters. The fate of the town is on the shoulders of Jared (Charlie Zeltzer) and a few of his buddies who abstained from the siren song produced by the ice cream truck and his poisonous treats.

When you initially see the title Ice Cream Man, you’d be forgiven if you thought this was a remake of the 1995 cult classic B-movie of the same name starring Clint Howard. Luckily for the “Hollywood is only remakes now” crowd, 2026’s Ice Cream Man is an original story, for better or worse. While there are several plot elements that are reminiscent of previous genre films like Weapons, the main plot is unique enough to stand on its own. With only a few glimpses of the carnage candy for the first 15-20 minutes, you have more time to connect to these young kids and their dynamics so it hits harder when they meet their fate. We get a brief introduction to several of the characters right away at a little league baseball game and immediately get the dynamics of the kids and adults in this town. Our main character Jared (Zeltzer) is a textbook scrawny, social outcast kid whose lack of inclusion ends up benefiting him. The rest of the cast is full of kids who mentally, verbally and physically abuse Jared and his few friends and adults who are purely there to fill up the kill count. Eli Roth has a supporting role as Jared’s pun-filled father that fails to make even the cringiest jokes even slightly amusing. After spending some time in children’s media, it seems Roth is still stuck in that headspace with this juvenile dialogue.

The biggest highlight to give Ice Cream Man are the incredible practical effects in some of the kills! The visceral nature of zombie kids tearing apart their parents or neighbors will shock the system of many casual fans and force them to shield their eyes. There have even been reports of some theaters having many walk-outs in early screenings due to the violence and brutality. The brutal levels of some of these kills go rival Art the Clown in Terrifier, but they dilute it with several crappy CGI and AI effects. It’s incredibly disappointing when a filmmaker who champions practical effects and the magic of old school horror uses cheap CGI, but especially generative AI. The animations of the ice cream logo scream artificial in the worst ways. While Ice Cream Man is certainly a lower budget movie, hiring an animator for this or a few actors for the flashbacks gives folks jobs and doesn’t make the end product look and feel cheap and lifeless.

In the end, Ice Cream Man won’t be the next big horror hit of the summer, but fans searching for gore candy will be satiated with these sweet treats. The bright color palette of the sets mixed with the brutal violence gives the movie an eerie feeling immediately and it almost feels like a nightmare that you’ve been trapped in. Ari Millen as the Ice Cream Man is almost silent the whole time, but his eyes and facial expressions strike fear into you immediately. Ice Cream Man is a creepy Pied Piper story at its roots, but instead of ridding the town of rats, he brings an infestation of violence against the ones who wronged him. While Ice Cream Man won’t be for the masses, it may find its place on many niche horror fan’s shelves one day.

Ice Cream Man will be in theaters nationwide starting August 7th! 

Rating: 2.5/5